So, I used to listen to Driscoll sermons back in, oh, around 2006-2007 or so, on my drives to work. He was new(-ish), popular, preaching about cool stuff like Nehemiah, and was funny. I even blogged about his stuff for awhile. And ... the short story of why I stopped listening to him is that I realized Calvinism is stupid* and Driscoll is dead wrong about, well, everything related to the Bible. And I'm not even angry about it. I'm just depressed, and feel cheated of any time spent listening to his words. While at the time I stopped listening to him I didn't have a short list of reasons why, I definitely do now. Really the easy reason is: he hates women. And, honestly, I think he hates men too. Real men. Because, Driscoll (despite how much he yells about it) hasn't got the slightest clue of what a real man is.

Anyway, I guess since he's been off my radar for awhile now--ever since he said stay-at-home dads are living in sin--I sort of forget that he's still popular and people may actually still buy the crap he's selling. Really? So, he has a new book on marriage and when I saw that last week I just nodded, rolled my eyes half-heartedly wondered if anyone was going to be all that surprised by anything he wrote. And, from what I can tell based on reviews, it seems that you get exactly what you pay for: Mark Driscoll, the only man on the planet who knows how to be a man. It's not a book on marriage, it's a book on how to be Mark Driscoll and (for women) how to marry Mark Driscoll. Shit, too bad he's taken!

So why is it exactly that this book is a "scandal"??? Driscoll's been singing the same tune for years---something about his penis being bigger than the gun he carries and Jesus hating sissies (i.e. people who don't have a penis)**. My only hope is that the fact that this is a "scandal" means we're finally getting it and getting over Mark Driscoll. It may be a fool's hope.

So, really, who cares what Driscoll has to say about marriage? Blah. Vomit. Get out of my Barnes & Noble. Don't bother***.

That's my refined critique of Driscoll for the day.

Oh, and for the record:

"Driscoll’s greatest hits: Stay-at-home dads are “worse than unbelievers.” James Cameron’s Avatar is “the most demonic, satanic film” he’s ever seen. A wife should keep herself “sexually available” to her husband and, if she believes the Bible, better be giving him frequent blowjobs. “Effeminate” church musicians should be mocked on Facebook. Abstaining from alcohol can be a “sin.” The church has turned Jesus into a “a Richard Simmons, hippie, queer Christ,” when he’s actually a “prize fighter” who is “coming back looking for blood.” The Bible says women can’t have leadership positions in church because they’re “more gullible and easier to deceive than men.” Male masturbation is a “form of homosexuality” if there’s not a woman present." (from Mark Driscoll’s Sex Manual ‘Real Marriage’ Scandalizes Evangelicals)


Notes:
*I think a lot of things are stupid, not just Calvinism, by the way.
**That would be crude, if it weren't so horribly and depressingly true.
***Okay but seriously I'm not advocating to blow this off and to not think critically about what this book communicates and how to respond to it (e.g. weeping)